I started 'dating' this 23 year old a couple of months ago, and right off the bat he took our relationship way too seriously. I should have known that this was going to be a stage 5 clinger when he brought a backpack full of clothes over to my apartment on our second date. I was confused as to why he was moving clothes in on our second date - I mean, we aren't lesbians.
On our 3rd date, he proceeded to get drunk (which I respect), but then he told me that he loved me (which I do not respect). I should have probably ended it there and broken his young, inexperienced heart. He would move on. Besides being a little clingy, he was cute and smart and had good intentions. However, I decided to continue seeing him in hopes that he was just nervous and new at dating and didn't really know how to act.
Throughout our 'relationship', he bought things for my apartment. I did not ask for these things. I would come home one day to find a microwave sitting at my door, or another day to find a box full of other kitchen accoutrements. Again, he was being sweet and buying me things that he thought I would find useful. Then one day he came over to my apartment with an Air Conditioning unit for my window. He said it was too hot in my apartment and I needed it. I was planning on buying one anyway because summer was upon us, and in fact, it was hot in my apartment. I started to write him a check for the things he had purchased me, but he declined and said 'don't worry about it'.
Now, we continued to 'date' for a few more weeks when I realized that we weren't going to work out. I felt bad for the kid, but I didn't want to prolong the relationship if I didn't see it going anywhere. We parted amicably and vowed to remain friends.
He invited me out a week later to have dinner with a couple of his friends. Against my better judgment, I went on the basis that this was just friends and that it meant nothing more to me. Well, the kid proceeded to get drunk and tell me he missed me and wanted to know why I didn't like him. The whole situation was awkward in front of his friends and made me very uncomfortable. I told him we were never going to get back together.
I guess that irked him, because after that he became quite a psycho. He had left a couple of things at my apartment (a hoodie, a shirt and a couple of pairs of shoes) that I promised to pack up for him. He started texting me that if I didn't respond to him and return his stuff he was going to call the police on me (which clearly makes no sense. I mean dude, a hoodie!). I decided to pack his things up and leave them with my doorman for him to pick up so I didn't have to deal with seeing him. However, since that day, he has texted and e-mailed me multiple times demanding a check back for the things he bought me while we were dating. Now, I did not ask for him to purchase me these things. So I am thinking, what the hell dude?
I decide to ignore his texts and e-mails so he gets the hint that I do not want to talk to him and he is not getting a check from me. What kind of person buys someone presents, refuses to take a check when offered, and then when is broken up with, harasses you for money. Was I dating a loan shark?
Anyway, what is the proper etiquette when this happens? Do I suck it up, go against what I think is right and give him a check? Or do I continue to ignore him, pray I don't get stalked by him, and stick with my principles?
I vow this - I will never date someone that is younger than me again. I need to be the immature crazy one, and babysitting a potential boyfriend is not something I am in the market for ...
